Sunday, July 11, 2010

Rejection Sucks


Someone I love has just been rejected.
It makes my own heart ache; it gives me cause to reflect.
How hard it is to put yourself out there, to be hopeful, to make an offer of oneself.
How brutal it is to receive a "no, thanks," no matter how kindly given.
So now there is the licking of wounds, the questioning of one's self worth, the pain.

I think about my own hopes and dreams,
and resolve to do more to expose myself to rejection
because taking the safe path and not trying
might not be so dangerous
but it also yields no rewards.

Whether we are disappointed in love
or in our creative endeavors
it's a punch in the gut.

But if we keep trying like Dr. Seuss did,
remain as upbeat as Dante was about Beatrice
our hearts will heal and we'll be happy.


Still, there will be gloom despite the sunshine today.
As Charlie Brown so aptly observed,
when musing on the the lack of reciprocity from the red-haired girl:
"Nothing quite takes the taste out of peanut butter like unrequited love."

This song's for all of us who've had our hopes dashed. May it help the peanut butter taste better.

Say WHAT?


So there we are in Ikea, after a satisfying dinner of 100 meatballs, mashed taters and lingonberries, when we decide to buy some stuff in the food department. And what does my husband get but a bag of this coffee. Our son read the name and could not stop laughing. Our daughter read it and cracked up. My husband was aghast that she found it amusing at her tender young age.

I asked her "Sweetie, why is that so funny?"

She said, "Mom! It's like that alien guy Robin Williams played! You know, Mork from Ork? Only it's Morkrost, like he's been ground into coffee beans and roasted!"

I am very confident that is NOT why our son was laughing.

I am also not entirely sure that she wasn't laughing for another reason too.

Saturday, July 10, 2010

Embarrassment


Have you ever really wanted to do something, but then decided that you didn't want to do it after all? And then you worry that your friends will think you are a complete and total flake and idiot and they won't want to be your friends anymore?

Of course, I'm totally just speaking hypothetically here.

See, I have a friend - we'll call her Spamtastic Sorryass - who saw a really nice desk and file cabinet that her friend's late father had owned, and thought "Wow, that would be great in my home!" So when she learned it would be part of the estate sale, she said "Oh, I definitely want that!" And she even wrote out a check for it. But then she realized that she didn't NEED the desk, she just WANTED the desk. She needed a bunch of other things instead. And she didn't even really have room for the desk. So she felt totally foolish. And she quickly called the estate sales person and asked that the desk be put back into the sale. And then she prayed that someone else would buy the desk. And now she is awake at half past midnight, freaking out that her friend will think she is a total spaz because she kept saying how much she wanted the desk previously.

What a pitiful person. Ha ha ha! Good thing this is just a hypothetical situation, right? It would totally suck to be stupid like that.

Yeah, it sure would.

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

On Unexpectedly Finding The Perfect Sentiments in a Hallmark© card


I don't know about you, but I agonize a bit when I need to purchase a birthday card. And not just because they have become obscenely expensive (I saw one for $7.99 at Walgreens yesterday) but because I want to make sure that it is THE PERFECT CARD.

The card that will make everyone laugh.
or
The card that will express everything that is in my heart.

The card that will let the recipient know that I am THE BEST FRIEND EVER/BEST DAUGHTER EVER/BEST SISTER EVER....
or
The card that will let the recipient know that he is THE BEST SON EVER.



I looked at a lot of cards that were very nice. I almost bought one; the message was nearly right, along the lines of how proud of him his Dad and I are.

But I kept scanning the rack for something better.

I almost didn't find it.

And then, tucked behind some envelopes, I spotted it:


FOR OUR SON

ON HIS BIRTHDAY

You know you're blessed
when you have a son
you really believe in -
when you look at him and see,
above all else,
the talent and the determination
to accomplish whatever
he puts his heart and his mind to.

That's the kind of son we have in you,
and if we could wish just one thing
for you on your birthday,
it would be this:

May you always believe in yourself
the way we believe in you.



Happy Birthday, Andrew. We know you will do great things, because you have already begun to do so.

Sunday, May 16, 2010

Student Politics are not for Sissies


Each time someone sends me a friend request on Facebook, I spend some time first thinking about whether I'm comfortable opening up myself to that person. It's not that I hide my political beliefs or my propensity to use bad language from those I know, but some of the requests I get are from people who may have just met me, and I might not have had a chance to exercise all of my colourful vocabulary in person.

It's a particular concern when I get friend requests from young people. Some of Super Son's friends have sent me requests. I like to think it is because they admire me as a brilliant conversationalist and potential mentor, a trendsetter whose style they want to emulate. Yeah....sure. It does make me wonder sometimes who else is reading my scintillating status updates and snarky comments to friends. Do groups of students gather around the computer of one who has friended me, eager to see what I've written? Not bloody likely. Are parents of some of these impressionable young persons reading my blathering, aghast at my wild liberal viewpoints on issues like health care reform, social justice and gay rights?

Possibly.

But I just can't lose a lot of sleep over what they think. Because although some of what I write and say is pure silliness, sometimes a tad racy (truthfully, not much worse than the level of a "that's what she said" joke), some of my posts and comments relate to my core beliefs and values. And if I'm not willing to state those positions and take action every once in a while, I'd be a pretty poor role model.

There are some evildoers from Westboro Baptist Church coming to my town, determined to picket at a local high school. You can read the details here. I posted the article on my Facebook page, and noticed that many of the local high schoolers were already doing the same thing. Word spreads pretty fast on the interwebs. Young people are organizing to take action to counter protest these haters and spread a message of acceptance and tolerance and love. Super Son is one of them. And I've volunteered to drive him and others - who have their parents' written permission (I am not stupid, after all) to the counter protest. I am proud of and impressed by these young people. They are standing up for what they believe. That takes guts. And I want to support them.


I believe there are bad guys and injustice in the world, and it's up to people like me to stand up to that to make things better. Now all I need to do is decide what to put on my counter protest sign. Leave your suggestions in the comments. The photo at the top of this post shows some examples of signs from another counter protest. They make me laugh. Laughing is good. I think God likes laughter, don't you?

Here's my theme song. What's yours?

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

What Would YOU Do?

My second husband takes Stephen Hawking to task for his comments about time travel. Consider this my Cinco de Mayo gift to you. Enjoy with a nice glass of sangria. Then leave me a comment on this topic: What would you do if you could time travel?
The Colbert ReportMon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Stephen Hawking Is Such an A-Hole - Time Travel
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full EpisodesPolitical HumorFox News

Sunday, May 2, 2010

Civic Courage



As Super Son stays late after school each day, in rehearsals for The Wizard of Oz, (the story of a young girl's desperate struggle to return home to her beloved Uncle Henry), I am watching the news with great interest. Recently, Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia said something I thought was pretty darned smart:

Running a democracy takes a certain amount of civic courage.

The Oregonian editors wrote a great piece about the case involved. You can read it here. The case, Doe v. Reed, is from my home state of Washington. As the editors explain:
The court was wrestling with the nature of democracy vs. secrecy. At issue: whether people who sign ballot petitions should have a new right to add their names to ballot petitions -- anonymously.
I grew up in the Chicago suburbs, a place with some very interesting politics. It wasn't until I moved out west, first to Oregon and, later, to Washington, that I learned about the initative process. Professor X and I did quite a bit of research in the 1990's on Ballot Measure 9, a precursor to the recent Proposition Hate in California. Like those two measures, the one involved in this recent court case concerns gay rights. This little gem, which I'm happy to say was resoundingly rejected by the voters, sought to overturn domestic partnership protections for gay and lesbian couples. Petition signers didn't want the public to know about their bigotry and sought to have the names remain secret. The Oregonian observed that
But by signing their names on initiative or referendum petitions, people act as citizen legislators. Yes, in the age of the Internet, it may take some special courage to let your name hang out in the public square, but that is a minimal requirement of petitioning for a change in the law. ... Signers' names should be public in the same way that lawmakers' names, are public.
Years ago, I had a mad crush on was crazy in love with deeply admired one of my political science professors. Something he said has always stuck with me. Just a pithy little truism, I suppose. But that doesn't make it any less valid.

If you don't stand for something, you'll fall for anything.

I believe firmly in the sentiments expressed by this quote of Scottish historian Thomas Carlyle:

Conviction is worthless unless it is converted into conduct.

A military man, my professor undoubtedly knew of the speech of General Douglas MacArthur, in which he stated:
Last, but by no means least, courage--moral courage, the courage of one's convictions, the courage to see things through. The world is in a constant conspiracy against the brave. It's the age-old struggle--the roar of the crowd on one side and the voice of your conscience on the other.
Maybe if people know that they can't anonymously seek to prevent others from having equal rights, they'll think again. They might ponder how their friends and neighbors would feel if their intolerance was public knowledge.

I've testified at many hearings and written many letters to the editor expressing my opinion about all sorts of issues. It's not always safe; sometimes those who disagree have confronted me and asked to take it outside. Once, I testified at a Forest Service hearing about wilderness areas and the need to protect some places from motorized vehicles. A motorcycle enthusiast got in my face when I was done speaking, and walked into the hallway with me so that he could explain that God created those wild places so that he could ride his noisy, stinky bike there. He phrased it a little differently, but he definitely mentioned that it was God's will. A friend I know testified at a hearing in Idaho on another environmental issue, only to find that his small car had been flipped upside down by angry opponents.

But we keep standing up and speaking out for what we believe.

Here's a lovely little clip from The Wizard of Oz. Just click your heels together, say "There's no place like an open democracy" and then click on the pic below.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, Super Son is playing the role of Uncle Henry. He's going to be awesome.