I just discovered the coolest thing, and I totally want it!
This little beauty is called the Voco Clock. It wakes you up with the gentle voice of Stephen Fry. Whilst he has played a whole lot of characters, including some pretty hilarious women, the clock employs his voice as Jeeves, the perfect gentleman's gentleman.
The clock's promo stuff says it's his character from Gosford Park, but what do they know?
This clock makes me happy. It has some very funny greetings to get you going. Supposedly there are SIX MONTH'S worth of different material before it starts repeating. Who else on earth gives you that many greetings?! I'm not saying that my bedroom life is dull or even occasionally slightly repetitive or anything, but that is a lot of variety. And as my mother always used to say, variety is the spice of life. So I want to spice up my life. Is that so wrong?
Whilst these are all addressed to "sir" you can get a "madam" version. Click on the links for a very good time. You are welcome.
- It appears to be morning. Very inconvenient, I agree. I believe it is the rotation of the Earth that is to blame, Sir.
- I am delighted that you have survived another night.
- I'm afraid the staff has absconded, Sir, and it is my day off. I trust it would not be too onerous, Sir, to make your own exquisitely sliced toast and perfectly cooked breakfast?
- Let us seize the day and take it roughly from behind, as the Colonel used to say in his unfortunate way.
- Your horoscope is promising very considerable profit and equal quantities of pleasure. The world merely requires your presence for the process to begin.
- The world has been very anxious to hear from you for the last eight hours. Shall I inform the news agencies you're about to rise, Sir?
- The rising and the shining cannot be postponed indefinitely. Though shining is not compulsory in this intractable world, the rising eventually is.
- I feel sure you have slept soundly, feel thoroughly refreshed, and await the day with the anticipation of an energetic gazelle.
- It is time to face the day. Shall I cancel your appointments and book a hotel for a month in Seychelles? Very good Sir.
Don't know who Jeeves is? Well, get with it. Read the marvelous Jeeves and Wooster books by P. G. Wodehouse. Then buy the fabulous set of DVD's that were produced in Britain in the early 1990's. Twenty three episodes of total hilarity. Stephen Fry played Jeeves, brilliant valet to Hugh Laurie's hapless Bertie Wooster. You will love them, I promise. If not, I'm not sure I want to know you. No offense, but I have standards.